I’m still not used to Christmas being in the summer. That, plus the fact that I’m not seeing my family for the holidays for the first time in … I dunno, 15 years? … made Xmas sort of sneak up on me this year.

Until we saw this. This monster Santa, in the middle of the town square.

You sit in his spread-eagled lap, like an unwitting sacrifice to the red-suited malignant god of bad children’s nightmares. The sad eyes, the over-large, overly-red mouth…

Look at her, poor thing. She has no idea how close she is to having her soul eaten.

I have some idea what's coming, but I still can't escape the clutches of Dirty Uncle Santa.

Eventually, the insidious magic worked its effect, even on us.

We're wearing sunglasses so you can't see our dead eyes.